Following the spectular demise (wieghtwise anyway) of the Skipper (see Flabwatch for further info), it has become an open secret about the club that he is no longer the largest pork chop in the butcher's window. Indeed, there has been some fairly robust joshing about the girth of certain other members, with Messrs Prince and Peirson getting honourable mentions in dispatches. Things have obviously escalated beyond breaking point and the following statement was issued from the Press Centre of Barford CC late on Sunday night:

In a typically inane outburst after cricket last night, portly opening batsman Christopher Prince issued a potentially explosive challenge to the new-look, uber-svelte soon-to-be ex-skipper Mike Suffield.

"I'll weigh less than you by the time of the Club Dinner" he wailed unconvincingly. Mr Prince (15st 4lbs and with a mental age of seven) declined the offer of "a couple of grand on it to make it interesting" from the emaciated Mr Suffield (14st 4lbs) but there will be a forfeit of the winners' choice to be undertaken by the loser at the dinner. Or Mr Prince as he is known.

Sadly, Sandy Pierson was unavailable for comment.

Latest statistics from Lardarse Centre (it's a bit like watching paint dry!):

STOP PRESS

In a bid to avoid further embarrassment (especially at the proposed Club Dinner weigh-in), the contest was unilaterally declared a draw by both parties. Although at the time Mr Suffield still weighed less than Mr Prince, the latter had beaten his target weight of 14 stone and was content to rest on his laurels. Moreover both of them were on the lash at the Zetland Arms at the time...

Mr Romyn has stepped into the fray (just pipping Ladbrokes and Betfair), and has opened a book as follows:

I'm offering 4/1 against the challenger, Mr Prince, weighing in at less than the Skipper at this year's dinner. Maximum stake £2.50 and, if Chris loses as I confidently expect, I will donate all proceeds to a charity of Mike's choice. Any takers?

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